Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Facebook Etiquette. Such a thing?

Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with owning a venue, so it really has no place here. But, seeing how Facebook is a large part of our branding & promotion at Saint Rocke, and seeing how I actually "facebook" a lot more than (100%) than I used to, this blog shall be the home of this story. If you're not alright with that, stop reading.

Im 33. I had no cellphone until 26, and I had no email account until 20. I was raised with two brothers, and we were basically outside all the time. I played the occasional Super Mario or River Raid, but computers and TVscreens were not a big part of my adolescence. These days, my group of friends do very little social networking, so most of my time logged on Stalkerbook is business, and building the Rocke brand. Okay, enough background. Lets get to my little story...

Was on the other night, and on my wall read "Keep your soul, I don't want a soulmate", written by a girl that is my 'friend'. Now, of course we don't actually know eachother; she is building her brand as a TV personality, and I mine with the restaurants. But, I happened to be intrigued by that comment --which I won't digress on, but which actually doesn't make logical sense to me -- and so I wrote a quick note : "a second level comment, interesting." The point was, I like it. Right on. Somebody said something that had just a tad bit of thought behind it rather than quoting the Bible, their favorite Billboard hit song, or some over-quoted cliche writer. Right?

Wrong. Later that day, I log in, and I get this : "hey dude, scientology? it's a song. Chill Out." What? really? First of all, I was chilled out until you wrote a rude response. Secondly, what does scientology have to do with anything?  And thirdly, damn. I take back my comment above, where someone wrote something original & interesting. So of course, I wrote back, apologizing for butting in and basically saying sorry, to which I get another reply, this time pretty much scathing (without quoting, basically saying my comments were a cheap attempt at intelligence and I lost the game...game over). Whats the acronym Im looking for? WTF?

Is there no etiquette on this social behemoth? Can you not have some friendly lively debate on this? Did I miss something? Someone please clue me in. Or, is it: write comment = making a pass. The awesome part is that she expected an intelligent remark on Facebook which seems similar to telling someone you love them on facebook, or telling your wall to 'carpe diem'. Only in America do people eat cliches for breakfast.  The last part of the story is me getting riled up, and writing back, as I am an easy sucker to get pulled into matches of wit, or debate. It's like chess, the more the lose, the better you get. So I guess since I wrote last, I lost? That how it works? Or does anybody even care...

And then it happened. I was deleted. Just like that. Oh, the horror. No explanation, no letter, no phone call. Just a delete button, and poof, out in the cold. I wonder if kids have support networks for this these days.

Whats the moral of the story? Can't find one. I've failed the "cool" test on Facebook, and Im washed up.
Thank God.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

So much to this post...but as far as what this has to do with Scientology: Scientologists believe in three major levels of belief. In the "second level," they find what they call thetans (of which everyone purportedly has) which are alien spirits that must be exorcised for you to become your best self. There is a lot more to it, but since their "theology" is full of double-speak, semantical rhetoric, and a bunch of other bull-crap, I can't go much further than that, and I may be a bit incorrect.
Your 'friend' read waaaayyy too much into your comment.
I found this post to be very entertaining, btw!! :-)

Anonymous said...

She definitely read way to into your comment!! But luckily you don't actually know her, so it shouldn't bother you what she says..... Obviously she isn't on your level and doesn't get that way of thinking. There's no need to get emo about it.... Move on!

LW said...

That's one of the limitations of social networking: you don't have the convenience of reading body language, facial expressions or tone of voice to understand what someone is trying to say. Even when misunderstandings happen between strangers, they can still bother you. Don't let it bug you too much though :)

BTW I'm baffled by how much people actually know about Scientology...

Anonymous said...

and this is one of the (many) reasons i deleted facebook over a year ago... this on top of a whole long list of reasons and based on recent conversations with friends i feel like more and more people are going to go down this route of deleting their accounts. facebook should go back to college, where it was a simple way for college students to interact with other college students without all of the security and privacy issues, to name a few...

i challenge anyone to tell me 5 interesting things they've "learned" on facebook today. what news did you learn today? how about facts about animals, that a giraffe's tongue is 21" long, a cheetah can go 0-60mph in 3 seconds?

i see facebook killing brain cells and filling our brains with useless information and another way to encourage americans to be lazy. instead of picking up the phone and setting up a time/place to meet with your friends, good friends become distant, cyber friends - why do you need to see them, you can see the 100's pictures they've posted and friends of friends have posted. you know way more than you need to about anyone's life so why go out to lunch, what would you have to talk about? the fact that you've stalked them beyond belief on facebook and you already know everything they're telling you from the pictures you've looked at? do you pretend to act surprised when they tell you something "new" (that you've already read on their facebook wall)?

Anonymous said...

Tone frequently can't be conveyed via electronic communication. Succinct replies get misconstrued into hostility, or at the very least, snippiness. Thats not unique to facebook, it exists in email, etc.

For instance, the other day, I told a facebook friend that I wanted to "violently fuck their face and drain my aching nuts down their throat". They completely misinterpreted this.

Anonymous said...

And on the subject of Facebook...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/11/04/national-unfriend-day-jim_n_778742.html

Anonymous said...

I too am surprised that Scientology came into her mind; think about that.
And be grateful you were deleted. And, that you've got some great comments from some Anonymice :) I love St. Rocke. Bring back Makana! and thanks for everything else including sweet potato fries and a fabulous space.

Jennifer said...

Great story! True...crazy things can happen on FB and social media but if you have the ability and desire to connect with others it can also be a powerful tool.

I think social media is like sex - some people use it to get closer and more intimate in a relationship and some people use it to create walls and shut down. Depends on how you use it -not that the medium is bad or good.

What I really love about this FB story is that it illustrates how much of an amplifier social media is. It could have taken a few meetings for this girl to come out - but she quickly showed her "colorful" nature. Social media is an amp - like plugging in a guitar. I'm not saying people shouldn't meet - just that people are really broadcasting their tendencies online - as businesses and personally.

Anonymous said...

No need to sit in the stink Holden. Let the little lady drink the Alien moonshine while they await your Testicular Sized Comet.
It's time to ctrl, alt, delete and reboot yourself into the modern day Emily Post.
Sometimes I lose myself in Facebook, reading about people's lives and seeing all their pictures and posts and then I feel sorry that they will all be dead.