Tuesday, September 21, 2010

A Nonmusical, musical post about Sex & Music....

I know there are going to be some reprocussions from this post, but there isn't much you can scare an agnostic man with except for jail or more taxes. I got a text (which has replaced phone calls by the way, to the demise of human interaction) yesterday from a girl I used to date that I haven't talked to for quite some time. When we were dating, I was always trying to get her to further her love of piano and take lessons, because she had some talent. Not as a career move, not as really any motive-fueled reason, but because I find it a shame that most people haven't experienced how breathtaking it is to take part in the literal creation of a piece of music. She never did take lessons, and soon thereafter we stopped dating, although there was no connection between the two.

The text read: "I am taking lessons. If I get better, it'd be fun to play Saint Rocke, and you have to jam with me." Now, I am an over-analytical guy, so that text read something else to me. And side note - she has had a longstanding boyfriend.  So, although I was amused by the text, my immediate reaction was, uh, not happening. Because, I don't know if I'm along in this, but there is something incredibly sexual or romantic about playing music with someone, or even watching someone play music. In these cases, your ears transcend your eyes, and you're hearing beauty, not seeing it. I am a sucker for this - and I know it - and so I quietly declined the invitation, to which I received a text in the manner of "why not? thats rude".

And so i ask, was I rude by over-analyzing and thinking through the situation? Or does over-analyzing just make you look stupid? It's not my first circus in regards to this question....

10 comments:

kerry said...

Two things:
1. Great line: there isn't much you can scare an agnostic man with except for jail or more taxes.
2. Nothing good comes of texting.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you are still into her. You did the right thing, unless you find out she broke up with her boyfriend. :)

Sass said...

Seems to me that she was just happy to let you know that your advice stuck with her, and is now taking lessons.

Used "if I'm any good, lets play together" as a channel for letting you know this (probably wasn't planning on playing with you).

You should have just said you were stoked she was now pursuing it, and to hit you up when that day comes. You could have later made up an excuse as to why you couldn't play with her, no?

Besides, just because playing together is a sexual experience for you, doesn't mean it is for her.

Anonymous said...

The truth to your question is for you to get curious about... what is the motivation behind your concerns about knowing the answer to your question(s)?

The Analog Man said...

Interesting comment, and truth behind it. But why the anonymous? Why care what people think - like I told Sass today - they get it wrong anyway, so let it roll. Right Sass?

Anonymous said...

it sounds like you still have a lot of lust for this girl... she's clearly moved on and is at a good point in her life and was inspired by your suggestion to continue the piano. i agree with sass' post above, she wanted to let you know she's finally followed through on it although realistically she will probably never play at your venue you could have at least humored her by a nice reply. not much to analyze here seems pretty straight forward.

anyway, you seem to have a lot of opinions on females and their perspectives on things so what exactly are you looking for in a life partner? i remember a blog from a while back about "deal-breakers" why does everything have to have a label, why can't you just live and let live - no judgments, life should just be - simple, happy, love - NO?

perhaps you should write a post on your bachelor status and why you find love to be so complicated? maybe you can turn the prospective reality show into a bachelor show for yourself?? just a thought...

Anonymous said...

You did the right thing, brother! She's just being an LA chick. She could have said "Hey, let's meet for lunch and catch up -- I took your advice about lessons and I want you to hear how far I've come. But nah, she want's to play your very popular club. She's paying nice to get what she wants - typical LA chick that know she has a tiny bit of leverage. You did right in kickin' her ass to the curb!

Anonymous said...

oh, man, did you get this part right...
"...there is something incredibly sexual or romantic about playing music with someone, or even watching someone play music. In these cases, your ears transcend your eyes, and you're hearing beauty, not seeing it..."
because when it's right, it is like great sex and universal love and creating a life that will have a life of it's own...all rolled into one slice of time that will never happen exactly like that again.
and playing with someone or watching someone play doesn't always feel that way...in which case it's still usually fun...or should be.
but when it does feel like that...all you can do is pray that you'll get to feel that way again very soon.
found it odd that there weren't more comments that addressed that part of what you wrote.
keep writing...you're good at it and you've got things to say that matter.

Anonymous said...

I agree with what some others have said. Nothing to analyze. She just wanted to let you know that she finally took your advice. She probably feels thankful that you pushed her into realizing her talent, that's all.

I thought only chicks analyzed that deeply ;)

But, seriously...if I read between the lines of her text, it would simply be saying "thank you."

Anonymous said...

I couldn't agree more with how you describe the connection you feel when sharing music with another person. You're definitely not alone thinking that music is a very intimate thing. Sounds to me like your ex was interested in stirring things up by contacting you. You did the right thing. Love the club and love reading your blog. Keep up the good work.